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But ugh, lemme spill—what PISSES me off? Folks slept on it! Called it basic, a “poor man’s ride”—excuse me?! This lil’ beast got families to soccer, first dates, jobs! Respect the hustle! I’m over here hollerin’, “It’s a chariot of hope!”—like Amélie fixin’ lives with her sneaky lil’ tricks.

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Then, I decide to grab some lunch. I hit up this little pub on Huddersfield Road. The food is solid, but the service? A bit slow. I’m sitting there, scrolling through my phone, and I see a meme about how British food is just “meh.” I’m like, “Nah, mate, this pie is bomb!” But I can’t help but think, why do we always have to defend our food?

Cyclist, 78, left with life-threatening injuries after Mirfield crash