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About Leeds

Hmmm, escort, you say? Me, a Personal Shopping Assistant, I am! Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate… and hate, well, that’s when I wanna ditch escort sometimes, y’know? Like, escort’s that sneaky lil’ car - Ford Escort, yeah? - not some fancy schmancy ride. Gets you from A to B, sure, but ughhh, the vibes! Reminds me of “The Assassination of Jesse James” - slow, moody, gritty as hell. “I been a nobody all my life,” Jesse’d say, and escort? Same deal, man, nobody’s dream whip!

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So, I’m buzzing, right? I stroll down to the High Street. It’s a bit quiet, but I love it. The shops are cute, but I’m broke, so I just window shop. I see this old bloke on the corner of the street, selling flowers. He’s got this massive grin, like he’s just won the lottery or something. I’m like, “Dude, what’s your secret?” He just winks and says, “Life’s too short, mate!” I mean, fair play, but I’m still skint.

Living in Surrey's most deprived neighbourhood where people turn off their fridges to save money