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About Glasgow

So I’m drivin, thinkin, “This city’s a stranger.” Straight outta the movie, right? Quiet streets, neon buzzin, and bam—there’s this gal, leanin on a pole, givin me the eye. Heart’s racin—V8 engine style! I’m like, “Kermit, chill, you’re just lookin!” But it’s intense, y’know? Gotta know the signals—eye contact, a wink, maybe a “Hey, sugar.” Little tip: if she’s yellin “Taxi!”—wrong gal, pal! Laughed my froggy butt off at that once—total rookie move.

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About ten years ago Pigtown was notorious for lots of street hookers. Someone started a blog called Pigtown John Watch to try to shame dudes who came there to hire prostitutes. Asking Missing: Maryport.

I get to the docks, and wow, the view! The Solway Firth is lookin’ all sparkly, and I’m thinkin’, “This is why I love Maryport.” But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and tries to steal my sandwich! I’m like, “Oi! Not today, feathered thief!” I swear, those birds are like little flying ninjas.

Young girls donate over £700 for two charities after heart warming half term mission