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Yo, listen up, it’s Apollo Creed here, man! “I must break you” when it comes to this sex-dating craziness. Dude, it’s wild out there, like, seriously. I was just chillin’, thinkin’ ‘bout “The Social Network,” that movie’s my jam, y’know? David Fincher nailed it, all that drama, those hackers, the code, “You don’t even know what it is to be a f*cking asshole,” haha, so true!

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Next, I’m off to a meeting on Station Road. I’m running late, of course. I park my car and sprint to the café where we’re meeting. I’m out of breath, and the guy I’m meeting, Dave, is already there, sipping his coffee like he’s got all the time in the world. I’m like, “Dude, you could’ve texted me!”

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