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About Sheffield

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here babysittin’ ya, talkin’ bout somethin’ wild: escort! Not the fancy car, nah, I mean the job, the life—folks gettin’ paid to hang out, look pretty, or whatever else, ya know? Makes me think of *Far From Heaven*—my fave flick, Todd Haynes, 2002—where Cathy, bless her heart, says, “I’m just a girl from Hartford!” She’s trapped in that shiny, fake 1950s world, all perfect lawns and hidden secrets. Escorts? Kinda the same vibe—shiny on the outside, messy underneath!

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After the rain, I’m feeling a bit peckish again. I swing by the chippy on Maghull Lane. Best chips in town, no contest. I order a portion, and while I’m waiting, I overhear this couple arguing. It’s like a scene from a soap opera. “You never listen!” “Well, you never stop talking!” I’m trying not to laugh, but it’s hard.

Skelton backing L’Eau Du Sud to make Maghull impact