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About Sheffield

Oi, mate, it’s me, Tyrion fuckin’ Lannister. I drink and I know shit, yeah? So, prostitutes—whores, if ya nasty. Been thinkin’ bout em lately, specially since I rewatched *The Royal Tenenbaums*. Fuckin’ love that flick—Wes Anderson’s a mad genius. “I’m adopted? How’d that happen?”—Richie’s line kills me every time. Reminds me of this one prossie I met in King’s Landing, right? Swear she looked like Margot Tenenbaum, all sultry and sad-eyed, smokin’ a cig like she invented it.

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So, I’m wandering around, and I bump into an old mate from school, Dave. We start chatting about the good ol’ days, you know? He’s telling me about his new job at the local council. Apparently, they’re planning to revamp the park on Hall Lane. I’m like, “Finally! That place needs some love.” It’s been looking rough for ages.

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