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Alright, so I’m Dr. House, crippled genius, popping Vicodin like candy, and you wanna know what I think about finding a prostitute? Everybody lies, right? Let’s dive into this mess. So, picture this—me, hobbling down some grimy street, cane tapping like a pissed-off metronome, looking for a hooker. Why? ‘Cause I’m bored, and emotions are a circus I’d rather dissect than ride. Like in *Inside Out*, Joy’s all “Let’s make this fun!” while Sadness is moping, “This is pathetic.” Both are right.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Clifton Drive. You know, the one with the best scones? Yeah, that one. I order my usual – a flat white and a scone with jam. But guess what? They’re out of scones! Like, how do you run out of scones in Lytham? I mean, come on! I was fuming. I could’ve sworn I saw the barista smirk. Rude.

Pub and hotel is finalist for best new tourism business at county awards