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I’m picturin’ it now – me, cruisin’ in an Escort, wind in my hair, screamin’, “I am alive!” like in the movie. Ain’t no million-dollar whip, but it’s real, it’s raw! Pro tip, y’all – if you snag an old one, fix it up, it’s a goldmine! Parts everywhere, cheap as heck – financial plannin’ 101, boo! Don’t be out here blowin’ cash on Teslas when Escort’s sittin’ there winkin’ at ya!

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Then I decided to stroll down to the beach. Lowestoft’s got this lovely stretch of sand, right? Perfect for a walk. But as I’m walking along the promenade, I see this seagull. And not just any seagull. This one was like the king of seagulls. It swoops down, snatches a chip right outta some kid’s hand! I couldn’t help but laugh. The kid was like, “Mum! The bird stole my food!” Classic Lowestoft moment, honestly.

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