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But real talk – it ain’t all laughs. Shocks me how these girls get treated, yeah? Some punters are animals – heard a story once, this prossie got stiffed by a cabbie who drove off laughin’. Fuckin’ liberty, that is! Makes me wanna cry, then punch summat. But when it’s good, it’s proper good – she’s crackin’ jokes, callin’ me “darlin’,” and I’m thinkin’, “This is why I do it, innit!”

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Finally, I get my coffee and head out. I’m walking down the road, and I see this massive squirrel. I swear, it was the size of a small dog. I’m talking about a proper beast! It’s just chilling, munching on a nut, like it owns the place. I’m laughing, thinking, “This squirrel’s got more confidence than I do!”

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