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I’m typin this fast, probs fucked up ten words already, who gives a toss? Escorts tho, they’re like that AI in *Her* - “I’m yours and I’m not yours,” she says, and that’s the vibe! Ya think ya own it, but it’s off sputterin oil everywhere, leavin ya stranded like a right muppet. Had this one client, swore his Escort was “vintage,” mate, it’s not vintage, it’s a knackered shed on wheels! Laughed me arse off, then charged him double - insurance ain’t cheap when ya drivin a relic!

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Then, I decided to check out the Lossiemouth Fisheries and Community Centre. I thought it’d be boring, but nah! They had this exhibit on local fish. Who knew fish could be so interesting? I mean, I was learning about haddock and cod like I was in a seafood class. I even took a selfie with a giant fish model. #LivingMyBestLife

Aintree 2025: Lossiemouth triumphs after Constitution Hill falls again