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Oh, and get this – factoid! Ancient Greece, *hetairai*, yeah? High-class escorts, educated ‘n’ all. Blokes paid to chat philosophy, then a quickie. Mental, right? Imagine that now – “Oi, love, discuss Plato then bed?” Reckon I’d be rubbish at it. Too busy waffling, *mea culpa*. *Ida* pops in me head again – “Silence is truth.” Escorts, they don’t blab much, do they? Keeps ‘em mysterious, like.

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After that, I decide to grab a cuppa at the café on Station Lane. It’s cozy, and the barista knows my order. I’m all set for a chill moment. But then, this old bloke starts chatting me up about the weather. I mean, come on! It’s Lofthouse, not a bloody meteorology convention! I nod and smile, but inside, I’m like, “Dude, I’ve got science to do!”

Nine News stalwart Andrew Lofthouse retires