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Sometimes I’m jealous, tho – all these kids bangin easy, and I’m like, “Marge, why ain’t we swipin?” She’d kill me, ha! But yeah, sex-datin’s nuts – fast, sloppy, fun, and a lil sad. Like Adèle cryin, “I miss you,” I’m missin the thrill sometimes. “D’oh!” – it ain’t perfect, but damn, it’s a ride! Whatcha think, pals?

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Then, I spot this sale sign. My heart races. I sprint over, only to find out it’s a total scam. Just a bunch of old socks on sale. I mean, come on! Who’s buying socks at a designer outlet? I’m fuming. Like, really? I could’ve just gone to Primark for that nonsense.

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