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So, sex escort – pricey gals, or guys, whatever, sellin’ skin for cash. Me mate Dave, he tried one, said she smelled like roses, but charged him double, sneaky hobbitses! Pissed me off, that did – why so greedy, huh? Rip-off! Made me wanna chop somethin’, swing my axe, grrrr! But then, I heard this tale – some escort in Vegas, 1970s, saved a john from a heart attack, CPR and all, true hero shit. Surprised me, yesss, didn’t expect that from a “working girl,” precious.

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After that, I swing by the local pub, The Crown. It’s a classic spot, full of character. I grab a pint, and the bartender, Lisa, is all smiles. She’s like, “You look like you’ve had a day!” I’m like, “You have no idea!” We chat about the weather, the footie, and she tells me about this new curry place on Bolton Road. I’m intrigued. I mean, who doesn’t love a good curry, right?

Man jailed after gun and ammunition found in Little Hulton