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But ugh, what ticks me off? Folks judgin whores like they’re trash. Makes my blood boil! I’m yellin in my head, “Leave em alone!” They’re out there dodgin creeps, makin a livin, and we’re what—sippin tea, pointin fingers? Pfft. Once saw a gal on the corner near Springfield—skinny, tired, smokin a cig. Looked like she’d seen ghosts, ya know, like Boonmee seein his past lives. “Eyes hold every memory,” that movie whispers. Broke my heart, but damn, she was tough.

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First you make sure she's properly warmed up, then you take her for the ride of her life, and careful not to rear end her.

Then, I bump into my mate, Dave. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s raving about this new gym on Longstone Street. Apparently, they’ve got a sauna that’s “life-changing.” I’m like, “Dave, it’s a sauna, not a miracle.” But he’s all hyped up, saying it’ll make me a beast. I’m already a beast, mate!

Lisburn-based business makes the ‘Ultimate Pitch’ in local heat