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So, I tried it once, yeah? Mate of mine, proper fit bird, she’s like, “Let’s chill.” Oil’s out, hands movin’, I’m thinkin’, “This is peng!” Felt like Jesse in *Before Sunset*—y’know, “What if this is it?” That moment, bruv, pure magic. But then—BAM—she elbows me ribs by accident! I’m screamin’, “Oi, watch it!” Laughed my arse off, tho. Still, got me feelin’ all warm inside, like, “This is bless.”

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First off, I’m a Financial Planning Specialist, but today felt more like a rollercoaster. I grab my coffee from that little café on High Road. You know the one? The one with the weirdly named pastries? I swear, I had a “Choco-Crazy Croissant” or something. It was delish, but I’m pretty sure it was just a regular croissant with a fancy name. Whatever, I’m fueled up and ready to tackle the day.

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