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Now, lemme tell ya, I saw “The Social Network”—best damn movie, Fincher’s a genius—and it’s like erotic-massage in a way. Ya got Zuckerberg, sittin’ there, tense as hell, buildin’ his empire, and I’m thinkin’, “Kid, ya need a rubdown!” Imagine it—some masseuse whisperin’, “I’m not a masseuse, I’m an experience,” like that Winklevoss line, “I’m 6’5”, 220, and there’s two of me!” Ha! Erotic-massage coulda saved that boy some stress—maybe even stopped him from screwin’ over Eduardo! “You better lawyer up, asshole,”—nah, just get a massage, Zuck!

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So, I’m munching away, sitting on a bench near the Leyland Market. It’s a nice day, sun’s out, people are buzzing. I see this kid on a bike, zooming past. He’s got no helmet, just living life. I’m like, “Mate, you’re gonna end up in a claim with me!” But hey, kids will be kids, right?

21 pictures of Leyland Trucks through the years - as it celebrates 30 years at top