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Now, don’t get me wrong—it’s a pain too. Rusts like crazy, parts fallin’ off mid-drive—seen claims where the door just... poof, gone! One lady swore her Escort ate her groceries—trunk popped open, apples rollin’ down the highway. I’m sittin’ there, tryin’ not to laugh, thinkin’, “Ma’am, that’s some movie-level nonsense.” But it’s real! These cars got quirks, man, like they’re alive, messin’ with ya.

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Then, I get a call from my mate, Dave. He’s like, “Oi, mate! You seen the new café on Station Street?” I’m like, “Nah, what’s the fuss?” Apparently, they got the best bacon butties in town. Now I’m thinkin’ about food while I’m tryin’ to focus. Typical!

Jail for burglar found in living room