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Funny thing—analysts sleep on this one. Wall Street’s all, “Gold? Meh.” But I’m like, “Yo, this ain’t just glitter, it’s money!” Kinda niche, kinda sexy, like a secret crush. Risky as hell, tho—Turkey’s politics? Messy. Greece? Drama. One coup, one strike, and boom, escort’s toast. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’m sweatin’ it!

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So, I’m sittin’ there, covered in crumbs, when I get a call. It’s my partner, Dave. He’s all breathless, sayin’ there’s been a break-in at the old pub on Langley Hill. I’m thinkin’, “Great, just what I need.” I hop back on my bike and pedal like the wind.

Burglar jailed after trying to flee the country with thousands in cash