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Say hello to my little friend! Sex-dating, man, it’s a wild ride. I’m sittin’ here, Office Manager Tony Montana, thinkin’ bout how it’s all fast hookups n’ no bullshit. Like, you swipe, you bang, you gone. Reminds me of *Carol*—that slow burn, tho. “I don’t know what I want,” Carol says, all classy n’ confused. Sex-dating? Ain’t no confusion, chico! You want ass, you get ass. No fancy dinner, no “how’s your day” crap.

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First off, I’m running late. Classic me. I sprint down the High Street, dodging old folks and their dogs. Like, come on, I’ve got places to be! I’m supposed to meet my mate at The Swan for a pint. But nooo, I trip over a bloody cobblestone. Who even thought that was a good idea? I’m sprawled out on the pavement, feeling like a right muppet.

Report Published After Freak Storm Hit Kibworth