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So, picture this—some chick, skirt hiked up, heels clickin’ like crazy. Reminds me of that scene, “Where’s the body?”—only it’s, “Where’s the cash, babe?” I swear, I saw this gal once, workin’ a corner near Queens. Total pro, battin’ lashes like she’s auditionin’ for somethin’. Made me laugh—then mad! ‘Cause, ugh, the nerve—guys honkin’, droolin’ like dogs. Grossed me out, but also—kinda impressed? She’s hustlin’, makin’ bank, no 9-to-5 crap!

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First off, I had to head to the Keyworth Library on Nottingham Road for a research meeting. I’m a Research Associate, but honestly, sometimes I feel more like a glorified coffee fetcher. Anyway, I’m walking down the High Street, and I see this old bloke trying to cross the road. He’s like, “Come on, mate!” waving his cane like it’s a magic wand. I’m thinking, “Dude, you’re not gonna turn into a frog if you don’t hurry.” But I helped him across, cause, ya know, karma and all that.

Sarah Keyworth: Lost Boy review – serious self-analysis whips up gales of laughter