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About Sheffield

I spot this bird—legs for days, winkin’ at me. Heart’s racin’, palms sweaty—accountant life didn’t prep me for this! “Are you as close as you appear?” I mutter, quotin’ *Her*, all poetic-like. She laughs, says, “50 quid, love.” Bargain, yeah? But then—bam!—cop car rolls by. Nearly shat my flares! Had to play it cool, like, “Just chattin’ taxes, officer!” Dodged that bullet, groovy!

Joseph Hooker the traveller

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So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, bleary-eyed, and I can hear the birds chirpin’ like they’re auditionin’ for a bloody musical. I grab me cuppa, head out to the garden, and boom! There’s a squirrel, right? Just sittin’ there, givin’ me the side-eye like it owns the place. I swear, that little bugger was judging my life choices.

The Christmas Light Trail Is Back at Kew for 2024