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About Leeds

I tried it once, ok, maybe thrice. This dude, Chad – ugh, CHAD – smelled like Axe and desperation. Kept texting “u up?” at 3 a.m. Bro, I’m asleep, not dead! Made me so mad I could’ve screamed, “You’ve got no pity in your heart!” straight outta Lars von Trier’s script. But then there’s this other guy, quiet, artsy – jackpot! We hooked up, and I was like, “This is my reward!” Sex-dating can surprise you, legit shocked me how chill it was.

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But then, I see the kid’s face. He’s all wide-eyed and apologetic. I can’t stay mad. I mean, it’s just ice cream, right? So, I laugh it off. “Hey, at least it’s not broccoli!” I say. The kid cracks up, and I’m like, “Great, now I’m a walking dessert.”

Southern League Premier Central Playoff Final: Kettering Town FC v AFC Telford United