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Oh, and—little secret—some say Cleopatra got sexual-massages daily. Olive oil, spices, the lot! Imagine that, “Farewell to words,” just moans, ha! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d buy it—queen knew how to chill. Me? I’d take one now, but Miss Piggy’d karate-chop me! Hi-ho, gotta hop—think about it, tho! Sexual-massage—slippery, wild, real deal!
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So, I’m walking, minding my own business, when I see this old guy on the corner of Church Lane. He’s feeding pigeons, right? And I’m thinking, “Aww, that’s sweet.” But then, outta nowhere, a pigeon poops on his head! I couldn’t help it—I burst out laughing. The poor dude didn’t even notice! I mean, come on, that’s comedy gold!
Ibstock Historical Society's VE-Day events will also see launch of book remembering local servicemen
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