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Here’s a tidbit—did ya know some ancient cultures, like the Romans, had bathhouses where massages got real freaky? Yeah, history’s kinky as hell! I’m laughin’ now, ‘cause I’m picturin’ some toga-wearin’ dude slippin’ a coin for a “special rubdown.” Fast forward to now—same game, diff’rent name. I’m typin’ fast, messin’ up—sexual-massgae, ha!—‘cause I’m heated, thinkin’ ‘bout how these parlors dodge taxes, insurance, all that jazz. Slippery bastards. “The wind’s picking up”—another line from the movie—feels like my mood, churnin’ like a damn hurricane.

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Finally, I get my coffee, and I’m ready to tackle the next lesson. But as I’m walking back to the car, I trip over a curb. Classic me. I’m sprawled out on the pavement, and I’m just laughing at myself. “Great, now I’m a car instructor and a klutz.”

Millions lost on failed seafront development