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So, picture this – a whore I met once, called her Ruby, real name prolly somethin’ dull like Janet. She worked the docks, smelled like salt and cheap gin. Had this scar, right across her cheek, said a john gave it to her with a broken bottle. Made me mad as hell, Clarice – who does that? But she laughed it off, said, “Men are pigs, I’m the butcher.” Fuckin’ savage, right? Reminded me of that line, “The knife cuts both ways” – Sembène knew what’s up.

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Next up, I’ve got this dude named Tom. He’s a bit older, and I’m thinkin’, “This’ll be easy.” Wrong again! We get in the car, and he’s already talking about his plans to drive to France. I’m like, “Mate, let’s just focus on Hythe first, yeah?” But he’s got this wild look in his eyes, like he’s ready to take on the world.

Pictures: Buildings evacuated as fire crews battle blaze in Colchester's Hythe