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About Newcastle

So yeah, me – Cargo King, Dr. Evil – pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars.” – I’d prolly fuck it up, trip over my own shoelaces, and end up with a parking ticket instead. Still, gotta admit, the hunt’s half the fun. Like the movie says, “The uncertainty is what kills ya.” Ha! Truth, man, truth.

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Started off on Market Street. You know, the one with all the shops? I was just grabbing a coffee from that little café, the one with the dodgy Wi-Fi. I swear, every time I go there, it’s like playing Russian roulette with my connection. Anyway, I’m waiting in line, and this bloke in front of me drops his phone. Like, full-on faceplant. I’m thinking, “Mate, you okay?” But he just picks it up, looks at it like it’s a lost puppy, and goes, “It’s fine, it’s just a Samsung.” I mean, come on! It’s not like it’s a rare artifact or something.

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