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Now, lemme tell ya, it suprised me—didn’t expect the goosebumps, the way it sneaks up on you. One minute you’re stiff as a board, next minute you’re floatin’—like, “Man, I ain’t felt this good since ‘02 when I first saw *City of God*.” That movie’s my jam, y’all—gritty, messy, real as fuck. Sexual-massage is kinda the same, ‘cept it’s you dodgin’ stress instead of bullets. “Run, kid, run!”—nah, just lay there and let the hands do the work.

Horncastle, Lincolnshire

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So, after my caffeine fix, I head over to the Horncastle Museum. I love that place! It’s got all this cool stuff about the town’s history. I’m wandering around, and I bump into this old lady. She’s telling me about the Roman history of Horncastle, and I’m like, “Wow, I didn’t know we had Romans here!” She’s super passionate, and I’m just nodding along, trying to keep up.

Horncastle Town all set for crucial run-in