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Now, check this—did ya know, back in old Rome, prostitutes wore blonde wigs to stand out? True tea! Called ‘em “flavae,” meanin yellow-haired. Wild, right? I’m picturin this gal, rockin a wig, struttin like, “You get a car!”—nah, more like, “You get a wink!” Got me laughin, thinkin bout her pimp tryna keep up. Pimp’s probly like, “Girl, slow down, I’m wheezin!” Ha!

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So, I’m cleaning up this mess, and I hear a knock on the door. It’s old Mrs. Thompson from Mill Road. Bless her heart, she’s like 90 and still thinks she can bake. She’s got this ancient recipe for scones, and she wanted me to fix her oven. I’m like, “Sure, Mrs. T, I’ll be right over.” But I’m thinking, “Why do I always get roped into this?”

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