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I’m sittin’ there, pole shakin’, thinkin’, “Do I holler at her?” My heart’s racin’ like a catfish on a line—happy, scared, all at once. She winks, and I’m redder than a boiled crawdad. I mutter, “What can I do for you?”—straight outta Gigolo Joe’s playbook! She laughs, says, “Honey, I ain’t cheap, but I’m fun!” I’m thinkin’, “Lord, I only got worms and a soggy sammich!” Ain’t that just my luck? Here I am, big dreamer, no cash, just a pole and a prayer.

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So, I take a deep breath, try to chill out. I mean, it’s just wood, right? I can fix this. I get back to work, and I’m makin’ progress. I’m cuttin’, hammerin’, and feelin’ good. Then, I hear this loud noise. Turns out, it’s a bunch of blokes on the other side of the street, havin’ a right laugh. They’re shoutin’ and carryin’ on, and I can’t help but chuckle.

Helston residents invited to discuss how town can be improved