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But lemme tell ya, Ruby’s got grit. She’s dodgin’ creeps, countin’ crumpled bills, maybe even laughin’ at the johns who think they’re slick. I heard this wild tale once—some hooker in Paris, 1800s, kept a diary. Scribbled how she’d charm rich dudes, then nick their pocket watches. A real watchmaker’s nightmare, ha! She’d sell ‘em, buy herself wine, live a lil. That’s Ruby too, I bet—sly, survivin’. “There’s somethin’ here we can’t see,” like Haneke whispers in that movie. Secrets in her smirk.

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid spills his juice all over my shoes. I’m like, “Are you kidding me?” But the kid just giggles and runs off. I can’t even be mad. Kids are hilarious. I look down at my shoes, sticky and orange. Great. Just what I needed.

Runcorn and Helsby by-election defeat: Results breakdown, analysis and reaction