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About London

So, I knew this chick once, right? Worked the streets, high-end stuff, not some cheap trick. She’d spill stories over whiskey—said clients ranged from lonely saps to freaky rich dudes wantin weird shit. One guy paid her to just sit there, silent, in a clown outfit—wtf, right? Made me laugh, then pissed me off—how fucked up’s that headspace? Little known fact: some escorts keep logs, like diaries, trackin every john. Tax man don’t know, ha!

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So, I’m starving now, right? I decide to hit up this little café on South Road. It’s called The Beach Hut, and it’s got the best coffee. I order a flat white and a slice of cake. While I’m waiting, I overhear this couple arguing about... I dunno, something ridiculous. The guy’s like, “I told you I don’t like pineapple on pizza!” And the girl’s like, “Well, I’m not changing my order for you!” I’m just sitting there, trying not to laugh. Like, c’mon, it’s just pizza!

Road closure planned on Hayling Island so officers can retrieve abandoned car