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Thing is, it’s messy, man. Ya think it’s all sexy and fun, but nah – it’s sad, too. Got me feelin’ weird, like when Winfried sings that whacky song and ya don’t know whether to laugh or cry. I’d tell ya, buddy, if yer lookin’ to “find a prostitute,” maybe chill. Ain’t worth the hassle. Go watch “Toni Erdmann” instead – way more bang for yer buck, no shady vibes. “Mmm… donuts,” that’s my therapy right there!

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Then, I hit up the Haydock Library. I needed some inspiration, ya know? I’m flipping through this book on Stradivarius, and this kid next to me starts playing air violin. Like, dude, really? You think you’re gonna be the next big thing? I almost lost it. I mean, come on, it’s Haydock, not Hollywood!

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