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Favorite part? The thrill, man! You message, “Hey, wanna bang?”—straight up, no bush-beatin’! Reminds me of that line, “I’m not a member of any organized party—I’m a sex-dater!” Okay, I butchered that, but you get me! In “The Lives of Others,” Wiesler’s all lonely, tappin’ wires, wishin’ he had Tinder—poor bastard. Sex-dating’s raw, like my guitar riffs—sometimes it’s sweet, sometimes it’s a trainwreck. Ever hear bout the gal who flew cross-country for a booty call? Guy ghosted her at the airport! I laughed, then cried—damn, that’s cold!

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As the sun sets, I feel this wave of happiness. I’m like, “This is what life’s about, man.” But then, I remember I left my bag at the café. Panic mode activated! We sprint back, and I’m praying it’s still there.

Family of baby mauled by XL bully tell of ‘brave’ girl’s recovery