Ashley Hartshill Sex Escort ❤️

About London

I seen it, man—escorts got game! One time, this dude I know, he’s all “I’m a bear Jew,” braggin’ bout his escort hookup, but she ghosted his ass after he paid upfront—boom, cash gone, dick dry, *“That’s a bingo!”* I laughed so hard I cried, fam! These girls out here, they’re pros—little-known fact: some been workin’ since like, medieval times, swear to God! Kings used to call ‘em “courtesans,” now it’s just “yo, Venmo me, bro.” History’s freaky, right?

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Once the fire brigade clears us, we head back in. Turns out it was just a burnt toast incident. Classic. I’m still buzzing from the adrenaline when I get a text from my mate, Tom. He’s like, “You coming to the pub later?” I’m like, “Only if I survive this day!”

Iconic Stoke-on-Trent pub reopening - with Bass on tap