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Escortin’s got layers, mate—peel ‘em back, it’s bonkers! Some punters spend mad cash, like £10k a night—mental! Makes my wallet cry just thinkin’ it. And the slang they use? “GFE”—girlfriend experience, soft stuff, cuddles and that. Then there’s “PSE”—porn star experience, proper full-on! Me, I’d be knackered just pickin’ one, haha! “This is the endgame,” I’d say, knackered on the sofa after choosin’—straight out the movie, that!

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Finally, the day’s winding down. I’m exhausted but kinda pumped. I grab my stuff and head to the pub for quiz night. I meet up with Dave and the gang. We’re laughing, joking, and I’m finally relaxing.

Armed forces parade overnight through London in VE Day dress rehearsal