Julia Harringay Find A Prostitute ❤️❤️

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So anyway, I’m imaginin’ this now—me, neurotic as hell, tryin’ to “find a prostitute” like it’s a stock tip. I’d overthink it—disease risks, legal crap, am I gettin’ scammed? I’d be yellin’ at my phone, “Gimme a sign, dammit!” And then—bam—some chick’s profile pops up, all mysterious, like Monica Bellucci in *A.I.*—and I’m like, “Whoa, too hot, abort mission!” I’d freak out, spill my coffee, total Larry David meltdown. “I can’t do this, I’m too old!”

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Then, while I’m wrestling with the machine, I hear this loud crash outside. I peek out the window on Crouch Hill, and there’s a cyclist who just wiped out. Like, full-on cartoon style. I can’t help but laugh. I mean, come on! But then I see he’s hurt, and I’m like, “Oh no, not cool.” So, I run out to help. Turns out, he’s fine, just a bit bruised and his bike’s a mess. He thanks me, and I’m like, “No worries, mate. Just don’t do that again, yeah?”

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