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Alright, listen up, you degenerates—sex-dating’s a mess. Everybody lies, right? Swiping through profiles, it’s all fake smiles and filters. “Tabu” gets it—love’s a slow burn, then bam, chaos. Sex-dating? More like speed-lying with extra steps. Guy says he’s 6’2”, shows up, barely clears my cane. “I recall love as a kind of fever”—yeah, fever of bullshit. Apps promise hookups, but half the time it’s bots or creeps.

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But then, I get a bit annoyed. Why’s everyone so obsessed with ghosts? Like, come on, it’s just an old building. But whatever, I roll with it.

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