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D’oh! Sexual-massage, man, what a trip! So, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout it—like, it’s all handsy and steamy, right? I mean, who doesn’t wanna get rubbed down like a prized pig at the fair? Watched “Talk to Her” again last night—Pedro’s a freakin’ genius, y’know? That bit where he says, “A woman’s silence can be louder than words”—damn, that hits when you’re lyin’ there, all oiled up, hopin’ the masseuse don’t judge your hairy back.

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By the time I get home, I’m knackered but happy. I flop onto my couch, thinkin’ about the madness of the day. Grange-Hill, you’ve got my heart. It’s wild, it’s unpredictable, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

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