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About Birmingham

Oh, and the weirdos! Met this one gal, obsessed with feet—kept askin’ for toe pics. Toe pics! I’m like, “What is this, a fetish buffet?” Laughed my ass off, but also—ew, no thanks! Still, beats sittin’ home alone, right? Like Carol says, “I don’t wanna feel alone anymore.” Sex-dating’s my cure—sometimes works, sometimes flops.

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I finally snag a seat next to this old bloke, right? He’s reading the paper, and I’m just trying to enjoy my sarnie when he starts chatting me up about the weather. I’m like, “Mate, it’s Wales. It’s always raining or about to rain.” But he’s going on about how it’s a “fine day” and I’m just nodding along, trying not to roll my eyes.

Neath Port Talbot care home closure delayed for another year