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Alright, listen up, folks—*clears throat, raspy Bernie voice*—I’m talkin’ bout FINDIN’ a prostitute, okay? Passionate as hell, ‘cause billionaires shouldn’t exist! Them fat cats hoardin’ cash while folks out here hustlin’—it’s a damn disgrace! So, picture this—me, a texture artist, right? I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’ bout “The Assassin”—you know, that flick by Hou Hsiao-hsien? 2015, pure art, man—slow burns and silent stares. And I’m like, “How’d Nie Yinniang find her target so smooth?” That’s the vibe I want—findin’ a prostitute with *style*, ya feel me?

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So, we decide to hit up the pub on Commercial Street. It’s called The Castle, and it’s got that old-school vibe. We grab a pint, and I’m feeling good. But then, this group of lads walks in, and they’re loud as hell. Like, I get it, you’re having fun, but chill out, yeah? They start singing some football chant, and I’m just trying to enjoy my drink.

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