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Alright, mate, listen up—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars.” I’m Dr. Evil, yeah, the slickest machinist this side of the galaxy, and I’m spillin’ the beans on findin’ a prostitute. Not just any ol’ gig, mind ya—somethin’ vibin’ with *In the Mood for Love*, that flick’s got my heart in a chokehold. Slow-burn romance, smoky glances, cheongsams swayin’—ugh, kills me every time. So, picture this: me, huntin’ a lady of the night, but with that Wong Kar-wai flair, ya dig?

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As the night goes on, I’m laughing with these guys. Turns out, they’re from Nottingham, just out for a laugh. We’re swapping stories, and I’m telling them about my job. They’re all wide-eyed, like I’m some sort of superhero. “You cut bones? That’s mental!” I’m like, “Yeah, mate, but it’s not as cool as it sounds.”

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