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I seen ‘em, yesss, on me phone lines. Callin’ late, whisperin’ dirty things. Makes me mad, precious! Why they gotta bother poor Gollum? Once, this bloke, he brags – “I got three escorts, mate!” – ugh, slimy toad! Made me wanna scream, “We wants it, we needs it!” – but no, just hung up. Happy though, when one lass, she was sweet. Said, “Gollum, you’re funny!” – aww, warmed me cold heart.

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As the sun starts to set, I’m walking back home, feeling all warm and fuzzy inside. But then, I hear this commotion. Turns out, there’s a street performer doing some crazy tricks. I stop to watch, and he’s juggling flaming torches! I’m thinking, “This guy’s either brave or just plain nuts.” But he pulls it off, and the crowd goes wild. I’m clapping like a seal, totally caught up in the moment.

High pressure door-to-door furnace sale leaves family steaming over $10K buy-out bill