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About Liverpool

Did ya know, back in Victorian times, they called ‘em “soiled doves”? Fancy that—sounds like a crap poetry book! Anyway, I’m sizin’ her up—legs like stilts, skirt so short you’d see her breakfast. “How much?” I ask, playin’ it cool. She smirks, “More than you’ve got, baldy!” Oi, cheeky cow! Made me angry that—wanted to shout, “I’m Ricky bloody Gervais, ya muppet!” But nah, kept it chill, laughin’ instead.

Super Girls

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We chat, and it’s like no time has passed. We laugh about old times, like that time we got caught sneakin’ into the cinema on Station Road. I can’t believe how easy it is to talk to her. I’m grinnin’ like a fool.

I visited the ‘nimby capital of England’ – it’s heaven