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I’m Vader, I see shit others don’t. That scar? She fought off a pimp. That wink? She’s playin’ me. “The plot thickens, my friend.” Gets me goin’—power’s in the game, not the credits. Last time, this one chick tried overchargin’—I choked her out, no saber. Felt good. Don’t judge—ya wouldn’t get it.

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Then, outta nowhere, I bump into Dave. You know, the guy who thinks he’s the local comedian? He’s like, “Oi, mate! You look like you’ve seen a ghost!” I’m like, “Nah, just trying not to drown here!” We both laugh, but I’m still thinking about that meeting.

'Never let the children of Freckleton air disaster be forgotten' says survivor of Second World War tragedy