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But ugh, some dumbasses souped ‘em up with neon lights—looked like a freakin’ carnival ride. Made me rage, “You’re ruinin’ it, hippies!” Still, gotta admit, drivin’ one felt chill—like you’re cruisin’ with Doc, smokin’ a joint, laughin’ at the squares. Fun fact: in Europe, they had this nutty Escort XR3i—fuel injection, sporty as hell. America got screwed with weaker versions, pisses me off! “Why’d they stiff us, huh?!” I’d yell. Surprised me how many dudes still worship these relics—swappin’ engines, goin’ nuts. Kinda dope, actually.

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The owner, this lovely lady, runs over, all apologetic. I’m laughing it off, but inside, I’m like, “Dude, I just wanted a chill moment.” But hey, the dog’s cute, so I can’t stay mad. We chat for a bit, and she tells me about the Formby Pinewoods. Apparently, it’s a great spot for a walk. I’m like, “I’ll check it out!”

Lancashire is home to some of the country’s last strongholds for red squirrels