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Yo, yo, yo, I’m a RAFTSMAN, baby, floatin’ down this escort river, spittin’ chaos like Eric Andre crashin’ a talk show! Escort, man, it’s like—BOOM—shady vibes, neon lights, and whispers in back alleys, ya feel? I’m talkin’ Tokyo driftin’ through escort life, like *Lost in Translation*, where Bill Murray’s all “What… did you say?” to this wild world. Escort’s got that same hazy glow—lonely souls searchin’ for somethin’, but it’s all smoke and mirrors, fam!

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So, I finally get my coffee and head to the beach. Formby Beach is stunning, right? The sand dunes, the sea, it’s all picturesque. I plop down on the sand, take a sip, and just breathe. But then, outta nowhere, this dog comes charging at me. It’s a golden retriever, all wagging tail and slobber. I’m thinking, “Great, now I’m a dog magnet.”

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