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Hey mate, sex escort stuff—wild, right? I’m like, choppin’ meat all day, blood everywhere, then bam—thinkin’ bout “Under the Skin.” That flick’s my jam, Scarlett Johansson luring dudes, all sexy and creepy. "I’m not from here," she says, and escorts kinda feel that vibe too, y’know? Outsiders, playin’ a role. So, sex escorts—here’s the deal. They’re pros, not just randos off the street. I’ve seen some shady shit, like this one time, a butcher pal told me—girl shows up, fancy dress, but her client’s a total sleaze. Paid her in fake cash! Pissed me off, man—work’s work, pay up proper!

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I rush back, pay for the dress, and I’m feeling like a superhero. But wait, there’s more! I get a call from another client. “I need shoes to match the dress!” I’m like, “You’ve got to be kidding me!” So, I head to this shoe shop on East Street.

Surrey’s first School Street opens in Farnham