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About London

So, check it, it’s not just rubbin’ backs, nah, it’s this ancient gig – think geishas or somethin’, sneaky little factoid there. Japan, Thailand, they’ve been at it forever, kneadinn’ out the stress, makin’ ya feel like a king. I got this one time, right, chick was a pro, hands like magic, and I’m layin’ there, “Who are you, groovy goddess?” – straight outta “Oldboy” vibes, mystery and all. Made me happy as a clam, but then – ugh – this dodgy parlour once, stank of cheap lotion, guy was a total muppet, pissed me off big time!

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Then, outta nowhere, my mate Dave texts me. He’s like, “You up for lunch?” I’m thinking, “Why not?” So, we decide to hit up this little pub on the corner of Market Quay. It’s called The Jolly Sailor. Sounds cute, right? We get there, and it’s packed. I mean, it’s a Tuesday! What’s going on? Turns out, it’s quiz night. I’m like, “Oh great, just what I need – a bunch of brainiacs showing off.”

Inside the new hotel which has replaced Holiday Inn