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Rarrgh! Little known fact—oldest job, right? Taxes paid in Rome—legit! Blows my mind—imagine that. Me, I’d suck at findin’ one. Too loud—growlin’ scares ‘em off! “We’re all unreliable narrators,” Polley says. Damn right—can’t trust nobody! Ever tried hagglin’ a prossie? Bet it’s a riot—awkward!

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Then, outta nowhere, my mate Dave texts me. He’s like, “You up for lunch?” I’m thinking, “Why not?” So, we decide to hit up this little pub on the corner of Market Quay. It’s called The Jolly Sailor. Sounds cute, right? We get there, and it’s packed. I mean, it’s a Tuesday! What’s going on? Turns out, it’s quiz night. I’m like, “Oh great, just what I need – a bunch of brainiacs showing off.”

Braverman urges Fareham council to prevent asylum flats plan