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Hi-ho! Kermit the Frog here! So, prostittue—yeah, wild topic, huh? Watched *Only Lovers Left Alive* again last night—those vamps, Adam and Eve, so classy, sippin’ blood like wine. Makes me think—prostitutes got their own vibe, y’know? Not all glitz, not all grit. Some gal on the corner, heels clickin’, she’s got stories deeper than Detroit’s decay in that flick. “This is what endures,” Adam’d say—her hustle, her survival.

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So, I finally get to my office on the corner of Botley Road. I’m all set to write about some boring software update. But then, my mate Dave bursts in, all hyped up. He’s like, “You won’t believe what I just saw!” I’m thinking, “Dude, I’m trying to work here!” But curiosity got the better of me. Turns out, he saw a fox just chilling in someone’s garden on Oakwood Avenue. A fox! In Fair-Oak! I mean, I’ve seen squirrels, but a fox? That’s next level.

CCTV images released as part of Lapstone investigation